Yesterday's comment discussion about the subtleties of MySpace only reinforced my intent to avoid it altogether. Frankly, I found some of the comments more amusing – particularly the complaints from my lady readers about receiving all sorts of friend requests that seemed to be intended more for Christina Aguilera* than them personally.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say what you all know – it's because you are girls. All you have to do is select “female” or use your first name somewhere in your profile and you guarantee yourself tons of traffic and the never-ending stream of internet come-ons** until you grow tired of the whole thing, unplug and move to Pennsylvania to join the Amish. Men, on the other hand, need to be the pursuers. So they roam through all the new profiles in their hemisphere, searching for new people with reasonably attractive pictures and sending short, typically ridiculously asinine emails and request to be added as a friend.
I'm not exactly sure what the logic is behind this. I've been a guy for almost all of my entire life*** and I will not pretend to understand why some of us believe that sending dirty emails to complete strangers will result in them flying 2500 miles for a quickie in the Holiday Inn at the edge of town. But they believe anyway...who says faith is dead amongst the techno-geeks?
In any event, this is yet another reason not to get involved in MySpace – it's too much work to actually look for my friends and I'm not interested in sending out pervy emails to strangers – these days I only send them to people I know.
Like your mom.
* Read: Drrrty
** e.g. “Hey babe, log on here often?”, “Can I buy you some bandwidth?”, “Was your daddy an administrator? Because he stole Linux kernels and put them in your eyes...”
*** Excepting the first few weeks post-conception, when I was a “questioning” zygote – not sure whether I wanted to be a male or female. Of course, it was just a phase. One I transitioned out of eventually and one that I'm sure we all went through when we were that age. I also experimented with heroin back then, but not for long because I didn't have veins to tap, arms to inject it, or a syringe.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say what you all know – it's because you are girls. All you have to do is select “female” or use your first name somewhere in your profile and you guarantee yourself tons of traffic and the never-ending stream of internet come-ons** until you grow tired of the whole thing, unplug and move to Pennsylvania to join the Amish. Men, on the other hand, need to be the pursuers. So they roam through all the new profiles in their hemisphere, searching for new people with reasonably attractive pictures and sending short, typically ridiculously asinine emails and request to be added as a friend.
I'm not exactly sure what the logic is behind this. I've been a guy for almost all of my entire life*** and I will not pretend to understand why some of us believe that sending dirty emails to complete strangers will result in them flying 2500 miles for a quickie in the Holiday Inn at the edge of town. But they believe anyway...who says faith is dead amongst the techno-geeks?
In any event, this is yet another reason not to get involved in MySpace – it's too much work to actually look for my friends and I'm not interested in sending out pervy emails to strangers – these days I only send them to people I know.
Like your mom.
* Read: Drrrty
** e.g. “Hey babe, log on here often?”, “Can I buy you some bandwidth?”, “Was your daddy an administrator? Because he stole Linux kernels and put them in your eyes...”
*** Excepting the first few weeks post-conception, when I was a “questioning” zygote – not sure whether I wanted to be a male or female. Of course, it was just a phase. One I transitioned out of eventually and one that I'm sure we all went through when we were that age. I also experimented with heroin back then, but not for long because I didn't have veins to tap, arms to inject it, or a syringe.
Comments
When you check out her profile, the big, bold "CLICK HERE TO WATCH ME SWALLOW" link gives away the fact that it is not a real person - but spam to promote some porn website.