Lost Sheep seeks part time employment, has own bow and explosive arrows

I read an ad in another one of the quirky trade magazines I get here at work that I think is a promo. Country Music Television (CMT) is searching for someone to fill the position of "Vice President - CMT Dukes of Hazzard Institute". Apparently, whoever gets the job gets paid $100,000 to make a few promotional appearances, write the Dukes of Hazzard Blog for CMT, and actually watch the show. But the best part is that you get to actually drive the General Lee!

Man, when I was a kid I had six or seven General Lee Matchbox cars, because all the jumps and stunts I would have them do in the dirt invariably ruined the paint and decals, requiring constant replacement. I never really understood how the real General Lee was always shiny and clean when my matchbox cars would get filthy after the first botched jump over the “river” (i.e. mud puddles in the backyard). I also had a bunch of Sheriff’s department cars (which usually suffered even more abuse than my General Lees), Uncle Jesse’s pickup truck, Boss Hogg’s Cadillac convertible, and Daisy’s Jeep with the eagle on the hood.

Anyway, I’m totally thinking of applying for this “job”. I wonder if I’d get to hang out with Tom Wopat, John Schneider, and Representative Cooter. Not to mention all the other questions…Would I get my own Flash? Are Boss Hogg and Roscoe P. Coltrane even still alive? How did Hazzard County afford a budget to replace 2-3 Chevy Caprice’s every week, not to mention insurance premiums? Must’ve been a lot of money to be made in moonshine I tell you what…

Comments

J.Po said…
Oh my god! You TOTALLY need to apply. There's definitely going to be a resurgence of interest in The Dukes of H with the upcoming movie (or is it a made-for-TV movie?). And you'd be totally perfect, given your months of blogging experience and your years of DofH love. I'll be a reference if you need.
Stacey Pelika said…
I absolutely agree with J.Po! Wouldn't it be awesome to be able to put that on your resume?!?
Annie said…
Wow, you'd be driving a car with a Confederate Flag painted on top. And when you honked the horn a little Reb tune would come out. But maybe Daisy a.k.a. Jessica Simpson would make a guest appearance.
grrrbear said…
Good point Sophist. Driving the General Lee might offend some people, but hey, I live in Chicago - who could *possibly* be offended here? =)

Oh, and the song the General Lee plays for its horn? It's the opening line of "Dixie" (specifically the line: "Oh I wish I was in the land of cotton").