As many of you who are aware of my vast medical pseudo knowledge can attest, I’m all in favor of medical advances (yes TOWWAS, I’m writing about medicine again). All my life I’ve been fascinated by drugs and what they can do. So when I read an article in today’s Wall Street Journal about a new drug to help kids hypertension I was more interested than most folks. But when I read it, I noticed that the drug is essentially the same active ingredient as in Viagra, just “dialed down” to a lower-level than the famous blue diamond lucky charm.
Am I the only one who realizes the consequences of this development? If this is meant to treat kids between 5 and 18, have they really considered the possible effects on boys in that segment? As a former 13 year old boy, I can say definitively that the last thing I needed in life was something that might assist the formation of spontaneous erections in math class. Women don’t understand the massive effort it takes for a adolescent guy to avoid all the regular stimulation in the room just from the other girls in class, and god help you if you have a student teacher like mine in 6th grade. Adding “Viagra Lite” to this equation is the equivalent to swapping out your regular 7th grade English teacher with Jeri Ryan from Boston Public and making her teach English in full Catwoman regalia.
I don’t care how much you lower the dosage, the male organ at age 13-14 will just use it as an excuse to ramp up its master plan to ruin your social life and make you fear women before you start high school. If we start handing that we’ll only see more young men unwilling to leave their desks to write answers on the chalkboard, refusing to dance with women at junior high dances (and all you girls through it was because we didn’t like dancing), and buying baggy pants. God, it’ll spell the early resurgence of the “baggy-pants” look all over again! Oh, the horror…the horror…
Am I the only one who realizes the consequences of this development? If this is meant to treat kids between 5 and 18, have they really considered the possible effects on boys in that segment? As a former 13 year old boy, I can say definitively that the last thing I needed in life was something that might assist the formation of spontaneous erections in math class. Women don’t understand the massive effort it takes for a adolescent guy to avoid all the regular stimulation in the room just from the other girls in class, and god help you if you have a student teacher like mine in 6th grade. Adding “Viagra Lite” to this equation is the equivalent to swapping out your regular 7th grade English teacher with Jeri Ryan from Boston Public and making her teach English in full Catwoman regalia.
I don’t care how much you lower the dosage, the male organ at age 13-14 will just use it as an excuse to ramp up its master plan to ruin your social life and make you fear women before you start high school. If we start handing that we’ll only see more young men unwilling to leave their desks to write answers on the chalkboard, refusing to dance with women at junior high dances (and all you girls through it was because we didn’t like dancing), and buying baggy pants. God, it’ll spell the early resurgence of the “baggy-pants” look all over again! Oh, the horror…the horror…
Comments
My dad was standing RIGHT THERE, people.
I still think it's better to be a guy. Yes, puberty is a little awkward, but I'd imagine that having to deal with boobs for ones entire adult life is a lot bigger pain. Jogging with boobs, for instance, must be a lot like jogging with puppies. You have to leash them up tight or they go bouncing all over the place finding new places to explore...