After hitting the midway, we explored the various livestock exhibits. While on the way there, we were stopped by the most persuasive garbage can we had ever seen. So effective was it that we decided to demonstrate its point in that I like to call “live action patriotism”:
As you can see, the GF (playing the part of litter) is receiving a retaliatory slap from America (played by Doctopussy). In retrospect, this re-enactment doesn't really effectively recreate the trashcan. To be truly accurate, litter would have to be littering *and* slapping America. I'll fix it later in post-production.
The exhibits themselves were held in a succession of four buildings devoted to goats/poultry, cattle, pigs/sheep, and horses respectively. The goats were small and quite vocal, so they got a lot of attention from the GF and Doctopussy. Much petting was involved, particularly if the goat was young and small. Then we wandered into the poultry section, where we were amazed not only by how many types of chickens there are, but also by how freakin’ ginormous they can get. For example, consider the following:
Notice two things off the bat – first this chicken is nearly as big as the GF’s torso. Second – it’s completely evil. Those beady little eyes, the razor sharp beak, the menacing countenance. If there hadn’t been iron bars between it and us I would have been out of there. And it wasn’t just this chicken that was big – they were all this big. I took some comfort in imagining how many chicken nuggets would be extracted from each one in a few days once the fair was over (this one scored a “twelve-piece plus happy meal” on the Grrrbear scale of nugget potential). Mmmm…chicken nuggets…
After cruising through goat/chickenland, we hit cattle. But we only looked at dairy stock, since the GF doesn’t like pondering the eventual burgerness of beef cattle (probably a good thing, since modifying my game into estimating burger potential would have been way harder). We scored free samples of udder cream hand moisturizer and saw a life-size model of a cow stomach. Then we hit pigs, but only long enough to see the baby pigs and the biggest hog contest winner (who weighed in at a little over 1000 pounds – a big drop from last year’s winner who clocked in at 1400+). That was pretty much all the GF and Doctopusy wanted to see, since they have not spend nearly as much time in Iowa as I have (and therefore I have acquired an immunity to piggy smell). Horses were next, but they were actually pretty dull since they were a little skittish or tied facing the other side of the stall (great if you want to watch pooping, but boring otherwise).
After finishing up with the animals, we walked over to the handicrafts building, stopping along the way to admire the butter busts of Princess Kay and her attendants:
At the handicrafts building, we were assaulted by quilt, after quilt, after quilt. The Gf and Doctopussy were both into quilting, but me? Not so much. I focused my attention on the bizarre – like a larger-than-life mosquito made entirely of embroidery or crochet (I don’t know the difference):
And a hand-made kayak made of wood. Complete with inlay of maple leaves.
Crazy what people have the time to do these days…
By this time it was almost 7:30, so we said goodbye to Doctopussy and headed back for my dad’s place. However, on the way home, the GF spotted a thift store. To the GF, going through a thrift store is comparable to finding an uncharted desert island – you just know there’s treasure if you search hard enough. For me, it’s another opportunity to find weird examples of the detritus of humanity. So we headed in – the GF off to explore rack after rack of clothes and me to find the weirdest thing I could purely for the purpose of blogging about it. And oh, did I score big:
Yes kids – it’s a box of Asian (not sure whether that's Chinese or Japanese) rat poison. Still factory sealed! What better to bring home from the thrift store than rat poison? Makes a great gift!
We didn’t buy that, but we did make off with a electronic crossword puzzle game for my stepmom and a vintage 34mm movie camera plus bracelet for the GF. Everybody won!
And think...this was only the first day there! More adventures tomorrow!
As you can see, the GF (playing the part of litter) is receiving a retaliatory slap from America (played by Doctopussy). In retrospect, this re-enactment doesn't really effectively recreate the trashcan. To be truly accurate, litter would have to be littering *and* slapping America. I'll fix it later in post-production.
The exhibits themselves were held in a succession of four buildings devoted to goats/poultry, cattle, pigs/sheep, and horses respectively. The goats were small and quite vocal, so they got a lot of attention from the GF and Doctopussy. Much petting was involved, particularly if the goat was young and small. Then we wandered into the poultry section, where we were amazed not only by how many types of chickens there are, but also by how freakin’ ginormous they can get. For example, consider the following:
Notice two things off the bat – first this chicken is nearly as big as the GF’s torso. Second – it’s completely evil. Those beady little eyes, the razor sharp beak, the menacing countenance. If there hadn’t been iron bars between it and us I would have been out of there. And it wasn’t just this chicken that was big – they were all this big. I took some comfort in imagining how many chicken nuggets would be extracted from each one in a few days once the fair was over (this one scored a “twelve-piece plus happy meal” on the Grrrbear scale of nugget potential). Mmmm…chicken nuggets…
After cruising through goat/chickenland, we hit cattle. But we only looked at dairy stock, since the GF doesn’t like pondering the eventual burgerness of beef cattle (probably a good thing, since modifying my game into estimating burger potential would have been way harder). We scored free samples of udder cream hand moisturizer and saw a life-size model of a cow stomach. Then we hit pigs, but only long enough to see the baby pigs and the biggest hog contest winner (who weighed in at a little over 1000 pounds – a big drop from last year’s winner who clocked in at 1400+). That was pretty much all the GF and Doctopusy wanted to see, since they have not spend nearly as much time in Iowa as I have (and therefore I have acquired an immunity to piggy smell). Horses were next, but they were actually pretty dull since they were a little skittish or tied facing the other side of the stall (great if you want to watch pooping, but boring otherwise).
After finishing up with the animals, we walked over to the handicrafts building, stopping along the way to admire the butter busts of Princess Kay and her attendants:
At the handicrafts building, we were assaulted by quilt, after quilt, after quilt. The Gf and Doctopussy were both into quilting, but me? Not so much. I focused my attention on the bizarre – like a larger-than-life mosquito made entirely of embroidery or crochet (I don’t know the difference):
And a hand-made kayak made of wood. Complete with inlay of maple leaves.
Crazy what people have the time to do these days…
By this time it was almost 7:30, so we said goodbye to Doctopussy and headed back for my dad’s place. However, on the way home, the GF spotted a thift store. To the GF, going through a thrift store is comparable to finding an uncharted desert island – you just know there’s treasure if you search hard enough. For me, it’s another opportunity to find weird examples of the detritus of humanity. So we headed in – the GF off to explore rack after rack of clothes and me to find the weirdest thing I could purely for the purpose of blogging about it. And oh, did I score big:
Yes kids – it’s a box of Asian (not sure whether that's Chinese or Japanese) rat poison. Still factory sealed! What better to bring home from the thrift store than rat poison? Makes a great gift!
We didn’t buy that, but we did make off with a electronic crossword puzzle game for my stepmom and a vintage 34mm movie camera plus bracelet for the GF. Everybody won!
And think...this was only the first day there! More adventures tomorrow!
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