One of the interesting parts of my job is getting exposed to competing companies who sell the same stuff. Or, who claim to sell the same stuff we do. Usually, their websites are pretty uninteresting. But today, I came across the world’s most fascinating website. When you first open it up, you won’t find anything terribly interesting. In fact, it looks like 99% of the other little companies out there selling hardware. But as you scroll down you’ll see that the breadth of product that they offer goes from the strange to the truly bizarre as you descend, measured by the number of times I hit “Page Down”.
1st page down: (A little weird)
LCD TV with built-in DVD player
Case of 50 Western Movie DVD’s
Case of 72 bottles of detergent
2nd Page Down: (Bizarre)
“Ultra Compact” DVD player
Hot&Cold Water Dispenser
“Pretty in Pink” Pedal Cars
Red Guitar Set
Minnie Mouse Talking Phone
3rd Page Down: (Down the Rabbit Hole!)
Sky Princess Tricycle
Girl Cruiser toy motorcycle (with flower!)
“Hand Crafted Trivet Baskets” (what’s a trivet and why do you need a basket to collect them?
“Beautifully Crafted” Die Cast Models
4th Page: (Okay, here’s the hardware)
Air tools
Vises, Locks, Hand tools
Power tools (Milwaukee, Nikota)
Wholesale golf clubs (oh crap, here we go again…)
5th Page: (AAAIIEEEEEEE!!!!!)
More pedal cars
Velvet shawls
Velvet Ponchos
6th Page: ([Passes out])
Beaded Hand bags
Belly Dance Products (for “Performance and Leisure”)
Flamenco Piano Shawls
7th page and on:
Finally, the actual hardware.
So, ladies – I ask you this: when you are tearing your hair out trying to figure out where to get that belly dancing ensemble with only two days before date night, where would you go to find it? A website named “BestTools.com”? I thought not.
Obviously, an entrepreneur gone out of control with a “crafty” mother-in-law who owns her own loom and is nuts about beads...
1st page down: (A little weird)
LCD TV with built-in DVD player
Case of 50 Western Movie DVD’s
Case of 72 bottles of detergent
2nd Page Down: (Bizarre)
“Ultra Compact” DVD player
Hot&Cold Water Dispenser
“Pretty in Pink” Pedal Cars
Red Guitar Set
Minnie Mouse Talking Phone
3rd Page Down: (Down the Rabbit Hole!)
Sky Princess Tricycle
Girl Cruiser toy motorcycle (with flower!)
“Hand Crafted Trivet Baskets” (what’s a trivet and why do you need a basket to collect them?
“Beautifully Crafted” Die Cast Models
4th Page: (Okay, here’s the hardware)
Air tools
Vises, Locks, Hand tools
Power tools (Milwaukee, Nikota)
Wholesale golf clubs (oh crap, here we go again…)
5th Page: (AAAIIEEEEEEE!!!!!)
More pedal cars
Velvet shawls
Velvet Ponchos
6th Page: ([Passes out])
Beaded Hand bags
Belly Dance Products (for “Performance and Leisure”)
Flamenco Piano Shawls
7th page and on:
Finally, the actual hardware.
So, ladies – I ask you this: when you are tearing your hair out trying to figure out where to get that belly dancing ensemble with only two days before date night, where would you go to find it? A website named “BestTools.com”? I thought not.
Obviously, an entrepreneur gone out of control with a “crafty” mother-in-law who owns her own loom and is nuts about beads...
“Fine mom, fine, I’ll let you sell your ponchos on the website, but if you think I’m actually going to sell Uncle Bobby Joe sell his pedal cars I’m drawing the line…Whadda you mean ‘write me out of the will’?…Oh all right…whatever mom...Belly dancing outfits? Sure, I give up, sell whatever you want…”
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