Personals don't need to be this personal

Like many people of my generation, I toyed with the concept of internet dating from time to time. For the most part, it didn’t ever work out the way that I had planned. I emailed with a few women, and even went on dates with several of them – a few more than once. But for the most part I found that the product never measured up to the hype. This is because it is much easier to market yourself as an interesting person through text than it is to do it face to face. When assembling your profile for one of these sites, it’s easy to go through draft after draft, endlessly refining what you say about yourself. Eliciting second, third and fourth opinions from all your friends and family as to whether your profile makes you look interesting, well-adjusted, and fun instead of smelly, covered in back hair and prone to fits of drunken violence.

So after having learned this I pretty much gave up on internet dating sites. But the one thing that I do miss about them was reading the profiles of the people who really had no idea what they were doing and no idea how to interact with other humans. These are the people who spend all their time playing Everquest in the basement of their mom’s house and expect that to get all the single women within a 60 mile radius eager to tear off their clothes and reveal the chain-mail bras that they all wear 365 days of the year (except to the airport, of course – it might be awkward).

And now I don’t even have to go look for them anymore. Some guy has set up a website specifically devoted to collecting the weirdest of the weirdos. Sure, it may be viewed as cruel, but I see it it’s a way for everyone else on those sites to feel that much better about themselves and their profiles. Heck, after viewing some of these, I suddenly was not surprised at all that my old profiles actually got women to write. Compared to them I’m a text-based Brad Pitt.

Comments

KC said…
Anyone who posts pics at a personals page should have to have their photos with teddy bears and rifles. That just makes sense, doesn't it? Very funny. Thanks for sharing!
Cheryl said…
This is better than Craig's List! So glad not to be a single gal anymore.