Ah, Sweet Justice...

I'm on the road again this week, taking a trip out east to New England for business. Earlier this week I was in Nashville just long enough to eat some barbeque and check out some Honky-tonk bars. Oh, and I had my flight back home cancelled - just because of a few tornadoes! It was a little odd to have the power go out at the airport every few minutes though.

Anyway, naturally, any time I travel there's almost always a story, and the flight out here was no different. In order to knock off Rhode Island from my list of "States I've been to", I flew from O'Hare into Providence. It was one of those small Embraer jets. I don't typically mind those because I can usually score one of the single seat rows where it's one seat on one side and two seats on the other. And I managed to do so on this flight too. Sitting across from me were two businessmen who left me alone* most of the flight.

Except for one moment, about 40 minutes into the flight. As I was sitting there reading, I suddenly heard the "click...click...click..." sound that only came from one source. Someone on the plane was trimming his fingernails - and it was the businessman in the window seat across the aisle from me.

There are two kinds of people in the world**: those who believe trimming your nails is a disgusting matter of personal hygiene best kept hidden away from the general populace, and those who think it's perfectly acceptable to do just about anywhere, preferably in public***. These are the people who trim their nails at their desk in the office, in the car on the way home from work, at the food court at the mall, etc. I can't stand these people. They are an unsightly barnacle on the otherwise smooth, silky surface of my life. Of course, I didn't say anything. I knew that God shared my opinion about these people, and knew his wrath would be swift and terrible.

Sure enough, about 10 minutes later - after the beverage service - Mr. Nail-Trimmer knocked over his glass of tomato juice all over his tray and pants and seat. It was everywhere, wonderful red stain-y vengeance for his lack of social conditioning - yay! I gleefully watched as he tried to summon the attendant for more napkins while the seepage of justice slowly spread over more of his jeans and shirt.

Like I said, God hates public nail-trimmers.

*Except to ask how the Stephen Colbert book was that I was reading - a present from the GF!
** Other than "Those who think there are two kinds of people in the world, and those who don't."
*** Note: this does not include those people who break a nail and need to trim it - those people are simply making the best of an unfortunate situation.


glacierdad said…
I always thought that there were 10 kinds of people in the world: those that understand binary and those that don't.

I'm with you and god on this one though.
J.Po said…
That public nail-trimming thing DRIVES ME NUTTY! I used to work in an office with one of them, and I CRINGED every time she pulled out her trimmer. ERG!
KC said…
I'm glad that you are less severe on those of us who have to fix a nail break in public. Ever since I started using "Hard as Nails" polish, my nails have been breaking off on average twice a day.