Are *you* still an undecided voter? Tired of having to *read* and *learn* all the time about all the different candidates positions? Are you all nervous and sweaty because your caucus is tonight and you're still "undecided"? Well worry no longer because once again - THE INTERNET HAS THE ANSWER!
Some research firm has created this website (based in the Netherlands, I think) where you answer 32 positional questions about your feelings on certain important issues and the site spits out your position on a two-axis graph relative to those of the main democratic and republican candidates and tells you which you are closest to, based on an analysis of the positions they proclaim on their websites, books/articles they've written, transcripts of debates, voting records in Congress, etc. It practically votes for you!
Now, obviously all you professional politicos out there* are probably going to go into all sorts of fits about "how they code data" and "accuracy" and "truthiness" - but my results put me smack dab next to my preferred candidate of choice, so I can only assume they are 100% accurate. It's like the internet knows me so well...
* Yes, I'm lookin' at you Spice and J.Bro